I have asked Chris Chin, our acting director of retiree social services, to tell you in this column about the professional help the UFT provides for all our retirees.

— Tom Murphy, chapter leader

According to the National Alliance for Caregiving, approximately 34.2 million people in the United States provided unpaid care to an adult age 50 or over in 2015. You may find yourself in this situation: a caregiver for someone who is frail — your partner, parent, another relative or a close friend.

While caregiving can be a meaningful experience, creating a deeper relationship and sense of purpose, it can also be emotionally and physically challenging. It can be particularly difficult when caring for someone with a dementia-related disorder, such as Alzheimer’s disease. The care recipient may not be aware of his or her own memory loss and may be restless, keeping you up all night. Or you may even have to consider the difficult decision of having to place a loved one in a nursing home.

Here at the UFT Retiree Social Services Department, we receive calls from retirees across the country who are family caregivers and are feeling stressed, isolated and in need of some guidance.

We recently received a call from a retiree who was caring for her husband who was diagnosed with dementia about three years ago. He wandered outside of their apartment one afternoon while she was in the shower. Frightened, the retiree dialed 911 and the police found her husband several hours later on the ground in a park a half mile away from their home.

The husband was hospitalized. Through our nationwide hospital stay-in-touch program, one of our geriatric social workers called daily to ensure he had the proper care in the hospital, advocated with the hospital staff for him to go to a rehab for physical therapy, and arranged for additional private-pay home care services when he returned home to provide a respite for the retiree. We also met with the retiree for individual counseling and connected her with a support group in her area. It was the first time she was able to express her feelings about caring for her husband, as she never wanted to burden her family and friends.

This is just one example of the many challenging situations faced by caregivers of individuals with dementia. In this instance, the caregiver recognized that she was stressed and reached out for help. Some of the symptoms of caregiver stress include:

• Feeling anger at the person with dementia or frustra- tion that they can’t do the things they used to do.
• Feeling guilty that you are not doing enough or that you do not want to be a caregiver.
• Sleeping too much or too little.
• Having little or no interest in activities you used to enjoy.
• Feeling you are alone, isolated or withdrawing socially.
• Lacking concentration that makes it difficult to do familiar tasks.
• Becoming more irritable or having less patience with others.
• Experiencing physical symptoms — such as head aches, stomach pain, back pain, joint and body aches.

It is important for overwhelmed caregivers to take care of themselves. As flight attendants say during the safety briefing on a plane: Put on your own oxygen mask before helping anyone else with theirs. When a caregiver feels overwhelmed, frustrated or discouraged, there are several ways to help alleviate this stress. For instance:

• Take care of your own health. Get enough rest, eat properly, exercise and see your doctors regularly.
• Learn to ask friends or other family members for sup- port.
• Join a support group to connect with other caregivers in a similar situation.
• Identify available community resources, such as adult day services, home care and museum access programs.
• Educate yourself on dementia and how to handle dif- ficult behaviors.
• Practice relaxation techniques, such as meditation or deep breathing.
• Schedule time for yourself to do something you enjoy.

Help is just a phone call away. Our Retiree Social Services professional staff of geriatric social workers and case managers can provide services such as short-term counseling and weekly stay-in-touch telephone calls, as well as connect you with community resources to help with caregiving issues.

We also assist with any other concerns you may face during your retirement years. To get help or find out more about our services, please call us at 1-212-598-6880.