Personal boundaries are the limits and rules we set for ourselves in our relationships with others or with work.

Boundaries are important to keep relationships healthy. By making time and space for positive interactions and our own priorities, boundaries help us avoid feeling burned out.

Burnout can show up in your personal life as well as at work. If you feel tired, detached or quick to anger, or find that things that once brought you pleasure no longer do, you may be experiencing burnout.

People with healthy boundaries can say “no” to others when they want to.

• Identify your priorities and know your limits.
• Pay attention to your feelings and give yourself permission to say no.
• Communicate clearly.
• Create clear structures for uninterrupted work time.
• Delegate work when appropriate.

Communicating your needs and limits is an important part of the process. Here are some examples:

• “I appreciate this is important to you, but I’m feeling overwhelmed and need some time to consider.”
• “I’m sorry I’m not able to help at this time.”
• “This topic isn’t something I feel comfortable discussing.”
• “I don’t allow people to speak to me in that tone.”
• Breathe and pause: Take a moment to ground your emotions and clear your head before responding.
• Disengage: End the conversation, stop texting or leave the room.
• Put pen to paper: Write down how you’re feeling and let go of your anger and frustration.
• Reiterate: When you feel calm and ready, restate the boundary you need.

Establishing healthy boundaries will set you up for greater happiness at work and in your personal life. When you say yes to others, make sure you’re not saying no to your well-being.

The Member Assistance Program offers counseling and workshops on a wide range of topics. You can contact MAP Monday through Friday at 212-701-9620 or MAPinfo [at] uft [dot] org (MAPinfo[at]uft[dot]org). For urgent assistance, call the UFT Helpline 24/7 at 1-866-UFT-FOR-U (866-838-3678).